# Statistics Quotes

Famous Quotes & Quotations About Statistics:

98% of all statistics are made up.

~ Author Unknown.

A statistical analysis, properly conducted, is a delicate dissection of uncertainties, a surgery of suppositions.

~ M.J. Moroney.

Do not put your faith in what statistics say until you have carefully considered what they do not say.

~ William W. Watt.

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.

~ Author Unknown.

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support rather than for illumination.

~ Andrew Lang.

I abhor averages. I like the individual case. A man may have six meals one day and none the next, making an average of three meals per day, but that is not a good way to live.

~ Louis D. Brandeis.

I always find that statistics are hard to swallow and impossible to digest. The only one I can ever remember is that if all the people who go to sleep in church were laid end to end they would be a lot more comfortable.

~ Mrs. Robert A. Taft.

I could prove God statistically. Take the human body alone - the chances that all the functions of an individual would just happen is a statistical monstrosity.

~ George Gallup.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

~ Author Unknown.

One more fagot of these adamantine bandages is the new science of Statistics.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Satan delights equally in statistics and in quoting scripture....

~ H.G. Wells, The Undying Fire.

Say you were standing with one foot in the oven and one foot in an ice bucket. According to the percentage people, you should be perfectly comfortable.

~ Bobby Bragan, 1963.

Statistics are human beings with the tears wiped off.

~ Paul Brodeur, Outrageous Misconduct.

Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.

~ Aaron Levenstein.

Statistics are like women; mirrors of purest virtue and truth, or like whores to use as one pleases.

~ Theodor Billroth.

Statistics can be made to prove anything - even the truth.

~ Author Unknown.

Statistics may be defined as "a body of methods for making wise decisions in the face of uncertainty."

~ W.A. Wallis.

The average human has one breast and one testicle.

~ Des McHale.

The death of one man is a tragedy. The death of millions is a statistic.

~ Joseph Stalin, comment to Churchill at Potsdam, 1945.

Then there is the man who drowned crossing a stream with an average depth of six inches.

~ W.I.E. Gates.

There are two kinds of statistics, the kind you look up and the kind you make up.

~ Rex Stout, Death of a Doxy.

Torture numbers, and they'll confess to anything.

~ Gregg Easterbrook.

While the individual man is an insoluble puzzle, in the aggregate he becomes a mathematical certainty. You can, for example, never foretell what any one man will be up to, but you can say with precision what an average number will be up to. Individuals vary, but percentages remain constant. So says the statistician.

~ Arthur Conan Doyle.

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